My mistress……..

I am sitting in the college library. I look around and see a lot of guys and girls busy with many different books. Some of them are, as I can feel, deep into it and there are a few others whose eyes are uneasily moving around and fingers drumming with restlessness, as if they are waiting for a moment of freedom or may be trying to connect with the bulky book resting in front of them on the table. They are not enjoying it and want to stop whatever they are doing. It’s torturous to do something which you don`t enjoy doing. In Steve Jobs’ words “you gotta love what you do. It’s the only way to do great work”.

Outside the sun has set and a veil of dark grey clouds is sweeping across the red canvas. Silhouettes of birds flying across crimson gaps in between clouds are faintly visible. How I wish, I had my camera with me. Alas! My great love is far away from me resting in her cozy bag waiting for her next outing during the weekend. It’s all grey outside and street lights have come alive after a long day break.

As I get back from the room in my house where my love occupies a desktop and across the skies which are turning darker with each passing second and through the tube-lit streets leading to my college gate and the window panes on the fourth floor where I am one among many who is busy with a book, I know that I am just rediscovering my great loves; photography, travelling, observation etc. through my mistress. My mistress, even though I have ignored her many a times, comes back to me at these odd moments giving me her love and care. I too love her  but I am  not able to express it in the way I do with photography. But one day, I`ll  proclaim to others that I have one more to my great love list. I am waiting for that day.

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(As I didn`t have my cam with me then, I had to chose from my collection for an appropriate sunset 🙂 )

Being Alone

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Some say I am a loner, may be because I spent a lot of time alone. I don`t know whether its good or bad, but sometimes I really enjoy being alone. At times I feel blissful while I am alone and busy with my little habits. Just like now,  resting on my bed in the hostel, scribbling in my notebook with nothing but empty space around me. Does that make me a lonely soul ? I enjoy interacting with other people, with my friends, relatives or even complete strangers especially toddlers 🙂 . There are some people whom I really enjoy talking and I talk  more with that person. But, there are occasions when I don`t like talking even with  those people whom I love to talk with. Thats the way I behave. At certain instances, I remain dead silent while my friends would be yelling to each other at the top of their voices. I love doing that, observing other people talking, laughing and enjoying. At those instances, I am actually alone even though  I am in the middle of a crowd. I feel, I produce my best works while I am alone. I imagine more when there is no interaction with those around me. I guess,  its good to be alone at times if  it makes you happy.

My crawl into the blog world

‘ This is what I see ‘ . I was not impressed by this title. Its my blog`s name.May be I`ll eventually get satisfied with it or even change it.Anyway, I was in a state of thrill and also distress about what I should  write in my first post.

When I decided to start  blogging, it was to help me to share my photographs and the story which lead me to that shot. But halfway through the registration, I started to feel something. It was the feeling which breaks into a soft-willed idiot`s mind when he is going forward with one of his stern decisions. In a matter of seconds, I started to think about Syrian civil war, killings in Assam and all sorts of carnage happening around the world. Thats what I do when in agony. Then I`ll try to come out of such thoughts and bring back my mind which was stuck in a mess. But first, I need to come out of it.Usually I just get lost in my fantasized tense world and finally end up in Hiroshima or Nagasaki  somewhere inside that jumbo sized mushroom cloud !! So I was in a messy situation and was finding it really hard to find the tale behind some photograph which I have not yet selected(:D You know what that means??? I was trying  to cheat; finding a story then  include a snap which fits in :D). But I found out that even to be a fraud, you require  some amount of skill(loser at being a loser 😦 ). By the time I finished registration, I was in a limbo.However after almost 24 hours of revolt with myself, I finished it.

Now I need your opinion to continue(I hope someone`s reading this).

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